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Beyond Breaking the Glass

Beyond Breaking the Glass

Name: Beyond Breaking the Glass
Author: Rabbi Nancy Wiener
ISBN: 9780881231847

A Spiritual Guide to Your Jewish Wedding, Revised Edition

by Rabbi Nancy Wiener

187 Pages6.00 × 9.00 × 0.50 in

Paperback

ISBN: 9780881231847
Published: 1st Jan 2012

$19.95

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Description
Contents
Authors
Praise

Acknowledgments
Introduction to the Tenth Anniversary Edition
Preface

1. Working Together to Create a Holy Context
Planning with Intention/Kavanah
Informed Jewish Decision Making and You
An Evolutionary View of Jewish History and Customs
Judaism: An Ongoing Conversation Responding to Ever-Changing Circumstances
A Model to Consider
Two Exercises to Frame Your Decision Making
Visions of Weddings
Families in Formation
Remarriage

2. Jewish Wedding Rituals
How Have Jewish Wedding Rituals Evolved?
From the Bible to the Early Modern Period
Modernity and Beyond
What Does This Have to Do with Your Jewish Wedding?
A World of Decisions and Choices
What to Call Your Ceremony
What to Include in Your Ceremony
Prelude
The Wedding Canopy: Chuppah
Arriving at the Chuppah
(or the Spot Where the Ritual Will Take Place)
Circling
The Betrothal Ceremony: Kiddushin/Eirusin
Welcome
Blessing for Wine
Blessing of Betrothal: Birkat Eirusin
The Ketubah
Getting or Making a Ketubah
Reading Your Ketubah
Signing Your Ketubah
The Marriage Ceremony: Nisuin/Chuppah
  Rings and Vows
  Vow Variations
  The Wedding Address
  Seven Blessings: Sheva B’rachot
  Breaking a Glass
The Pronouncement
The Role of Clergy in Civil and Legal Matters
Recessional: Formally Ending the Ceremony
Additional Blessings
Shehecheyanu
The Priestly Blessing: Birkat Kohanim
A Communal Vow or Blessing
Involving Friends and Relatives in the Ceremony
Some Pre- and Post-Ceremony Rituals on the Day of Your Kiddushin
Veiling: Bedeken
Tisch
Time Alone after the Ceremony: Yichud
Sharing Your Good Fortune with Others: Tzedakah

3. A Holy Process: Months and Weeks of Pre-Wedding Rituals and Celebrations
Personal Preparation Time before Your Kiddushin
Spiritual Preparation
Mikveh
Fasting
Remembering the Past
T’nai-im: What Should Be in Place Prior to Your Kiddushin
An Engagement Party Option
Celebrating with Community
Aufruf
Preparing with Family and Friends
Henna
Food and Music

4. The Non-Ritual Elements
The Rabbi
Engaging a Rabbi: A Modern Jewish Phenomenon
Choosing a Rabbi
Interfaith Marriage: A Historic Look
Your Shared History of Religious Decision Making
   Religious Decision Making and Your Wedding
Availability and Fees 94 Premarital Meetings
The Date
Considering Your Personal Calendars
Considering the Jewish Calendar
  The Day of the Week
  Shabbat and Holidays
  Personal Mourning Periods
  Collective Mourning Periods
Considering Convenience
The Location
The Wedding Party
The Reception
Rejoicing and Recognition
Food, Music, and Photographic Mementos
Cost
Clothing
Wedding Booklet

5. Postscript: Making Your Home a Holy Space
Appendices
A. Wedding Rituals Checklist
B. Planning Timeline
C. Creating a Wedding Booklet
   D. Chuppot
E. Ketubot
F. Birkat Eirusin Variations
G. Sheva B’rachot Variations
H. Additional Resources

Glossary
Photo and Art Credits

Rabbi Nancy H. Wiener, DMin is Clinical Director of the Jacob and Hilda Blaustein Center for Pastoral Counseling at the New York School of Hebrew Union College-Jewish Institute of Religion. She was named the Dr. Paul and Trudy Steinberg Distinguished Professor in Human Relations in 2012. She also serves as the rabbinic program’s Fieldwork Coordinator. Rabbi Wiener was ordained by Hebrew Union College-Jewish Institute of Religion in 1990, where she received an MA in Hebrew Letters in 1988. She earned a Doctor of Ministry in Pastoral Counseling from HUC-JIR in 1994. Dr. Wiener is a board certified chaplain with the National Association of Jewish Chaplains and holds a certificate in Pastoral Counseling from the Postgraduate Center for Mental Health, New York. She earned an MA in History from Columbia University and her BA magna cum laude in 1980 from Brandeis University. She is the author of Beyond Breaking the Glass: A Spiritual Guide to Your Jewish Wedding, Revised Edition that was published by CCAR Press in 2012.

Rabbi Wiener helped draft the resolution passed by the CCAR on officiation at ceremonies for Gay and Lesbian couples, created materials for CCAR members to use for pre-marital counseling and same-sex ceremonies, and helped draft the CCAR’s first official statement regarding transgender Jews. She served on the UAHC (predecessor to the URJ) Gay and Lesbian Inclusion Committee, URJ Departments of Jewish Family Concerns and Outreach and Inclusion committees, as well as a range of UJA/Federation Task Forces. She is a partner of the Kalsman Institute on Judaism and Health and was one of 18 selected nationally by the National Center for Jewish Healing to be SeRaF (senior research fellows) Fellow. She has taught at national and international conferences.

Dr. Wiener sits on the national board of T’ruah: The Jewish Call for Human Rights and the rabbinic council of Jewish for Racial and Economic Justice in New York City.

When I sit with couples planning their wedding, I am often faced with the challenge of taking a traditional ritual and creating a meaningful ceremony relevant to our modern lives. Rabbis and couples are always searching for sources that can add depth and creativity to the wedding ceremony. Beyond Breaking the Glass is exactly the resource that provides meaningful direction to help create a wedding that is both personal and creative.
- Rabbi Don Goor

Beyond Breaking the Glass offers a thorough, informative guide to Jewish wedding customs, both traditional and contemporary. Accessible and inclusive in its approach, the book encourages reflective decision-making in a way that will strengthen a couple's relationship, both with one another and with Jewish tradition.
- Rabbi Janet Marder, Congregation Beth Am, Los Altos Hills, CA

An invaluable and groundbreaking resource. Beyond Breaking the Glass presents a guide to Jewish weddings for couples of all sexual orientations, gender identities, and denominations. Rabbi Wiener illuminates how our collective Jewish experience is made richer through a mix of ancient and modern ritual celebrations. This is a gift to the entire Jewish community.
- Idit Klein, Executive Director, Keshet

An innovative, informative introduction to Jewish weddings that meets the needs of today's couples while respecting the integrity of Jewish tradition. A creative, inclusive, and eminently accessible resource for all couples. Rabbis and cantors should make this available to every couple with whom they meet in preparation for a wedding.
- Dr. Larry Hoffman, Barbara and Stephen Friedman Professor of Liturgy, Worship, and Ritual, Hebrew Union College-Jewish Institute of Religion

Thoroughly 'user friendly,' comprehensive, and adhering to high standards of compliance with respect to Judaic tradition and law, Beyond Breaking the Glass: A Spiritual Guide to Your Jewish Wedding is very highly recommended for personal, professional, rabbinical, community, and academic library instructional reference collections.
- Susan Bethany, The Midwest Review.

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Beyond Breaking the Glass

A Spiritual Guide to Your Jewish Wedding, Revised Edition